Tag: Question

Consider it pure joy when losses are wins!

bstuetze

downloadIt’s one of those verses… we quote it, pastor quotes it, everyone quotes it. They quote it at you, to you, near you. Do we really know what it means?

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4

Talk about what seems like the ultimate contradiction, “consider it joy…whenever you face trials”? Yea, cause when I’m facing trials, I’m going to be joyful…that’s gonna happen!

I was driving to the office a couple of months ago, like I do every day and I got a phone call. It was a good morning, kids got out the door on time, hitting green lights, coffee in hand, KLOVE on the radio, I was feeling it. Today, only good things were going to happen to me.

“Good morning, this is Betsy”, I answered the phone. On the line was a woman I had been working with on a very large project. To clarify, winning this grant would be the equivalent of my entire fiscal year’s revenue budget. We had been working together on this for months. Today was the day we would hear who won the grant. Only good things were going to happen today, I could feel it.

As I heard her voice, I could tell it was not the news I was hoping for. The disappointment was palpable in the sound of her words. I think she felt worse having to give me the bad news, than she did receiving it herself. I was stunned for a full 30-seconds, perhaps more because she pulled me out of the silence, “Betsy are you still there, did you hear what I said?” “Yes, sorry I heard you. I am so sorry, it was a great proposal and we can try again for the next cycle (in three years)” She agreed, and we talked about how much we enjoyed working together, we wished each other the best of luck and hung up.

So much for only good things happening huh? The projected represented an enormous amount of time and resources invested. As I pulled up to my first red light of the morning, this verse popped into my head. Thank you, Holy Spirit! In that moment, I had an opportunity to decide. I could mourn the loss, spend time (in my case hours if not days) spinning in my head about where I went wrong, what more I could have done, what more other people could have done. I could have looked for who to blame and been angry. Or I could take a moment to consider God’s greater plan for my life.

God was NOT trying to ruin my day. There was a reason we were not selected. It would have been a HUGE investment in time and resources, embarking down a road we’ve never been before. Could we have effectively executed the plan, living up to the expectations laid out in the proposal. Did I really have the time, along with my other responsibilities to lead the project? In that moment, I took a deep breath and felt an unexpected calm. In that moment, the second part of the scripture came to mind, “because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:3-4

I can think of a dozen reasons that I didn’t get the grant, but that doesn’t really matter. My getting the grant was not in God’s plan. I know that working outside of God’s plan for my life is disastrous. No, seriously been there done that, not going back! I was joyful in that moment that God is in control, that He has so much more for me than this one grant that served to exalt me in my career but not Him in His Glory.

The joy in this scripture that James talks about is Joy in the Lord. Not joy in our circumstances. God shows us His hands-on involvement in our lives through our circumstances, that is where our joy comes from, not in the circumstances themselves.

The storms of life will come, full force and try to knock us down. It is in those storms that God shows us His glory, His intimate involvement in our lives and His love for us, for our future and wellbeing. That is our joy! God knows and loves us, He wants what is best for us and use any and all means, (And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[a] have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28) to achieve His purpose for our lives.

Next time, you feel knocked down by the circumstances, take joy in the knowledge that God is actively working through them to make you more like Him.

I’d love to hear from you. Come back and visit at “Connectthedotblog”.

 

Reaping and Sowing

bstuetze

BrotherWord-Reaping-and-SowingLet me begin this post with a disclaimer…I’m ranting.

On Sunday our Pastor gave a very thought provoking sermon on the biblical concept of reaping and sowing. Now before you jump to conclusions, yes this is not biblical rocket science you’ve heard this topic covered from the pulpit many times, perhaps many, many times. No, it was not preached to make a point about financial giving, as it is so often presented.

The concept of reaping what you sow is so much broader than we often give credit for. This concept applies to all areas of our lives. Yes, when I said all areas I meant ALL areas! If you lie to someone, you will reap the consequences of that act. If you turn a blind eye to someone in need, that will be paid back to you as well. Our sins, our faith our best intentions done in secret and our blatant misdeeds performed in public, ALL will be returned to us…and in greater measure.

Luke 6:37-38 “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

What strikes me in this scripture isn’t that we should give so we get more back, it’s that when you give, whatever you give, will come back to you, running over and poured into your lap. We are often all to quick to ask, disgruntled  “I gave Lord, I was obedient Lord, I gave that homeless person my spare change Lord…where is my blessing, why haven’t I received it back?” However, when (not if) we reap the ‘rewards’ of our sin, we blame God for allowing it to happen to us. Wait…what???

God does not create double standards, He is a just God. He looks at the intentions of our hearts and gives in good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over.

My friends, hear this scripture for what it is, Jesus lovingly instructing his children on how we should behave and conduct ourselves for Kingdom living.

Do:

Matthew 6:1-4 “Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven. “So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.”

Do not:

Mark 12:38-40 As he taught, Jesus said, “Watch out for the teachers of the law. They like to walk around in flowing robes and be greeted with respect in the marketplaces, and have the most important seats in the synagogues and the places of honor at banquets. They devour widows’ houses and for a show make lengthy prayers. These men will be punished most severely.”

Yes, there is Grace! Many of you reading this have stories you could share about the unmerited blessing of Grace, of a time when you should have reaped the harvest of your sins but God decided otherwise. The best example of this is Jesus!

However we should choose to live our lives better, giving generously of ourselves in whatever way we can.

Luke 6:37-38 (MSG) “Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you want the same treatment. Don’t condemn those who are down; that hardness can boomerang. Be easy on people; you’ll find life a lot easier. Give away your life; you’ll find life given back, but not merely given back—given back with bonus and blessing. Giving, not getting, is the way. Generosity begets generosity.”

Live generously, treat others as you would want to be treated, give your life to Jesus and you’ll receive back more blessing than you can possibly imagine.

I’d love to hear from you. Come back and visit at “Connectthedotblog”.

Am I Talented?

bstuetze

TalentedMatthew 25:29 For to everyone who has, more will be given, and he will have abundance; but from him who does not have, even what he has will be taken away.

I have been on an all-out quest to know Jesus better. I want to be a sincere and authentic disciple, I want to know Jesus so well that sharing Him with others is just as natural to me as telling people about my children’s crazy antics. The best way for me to know Him, is to bury myself in His words (Bible) and though prayer, talking with Him daily.

I love a good story and believe it or not the Bible is full of them. Reading through the gospels is like experiencing the times and culture of Jesus day. We can glean so much from His words that resound so clearly today…yes, His words from some 2000 years ago resound today.

One of my favorite parables is that of the talents. A fav but one I still struggled to fully comprehend. In this story Jesus tells of a man who is traveling far away, so he places his possessions (talents) in the hands of three servants. To the first he gives five, the second two and the last one. The first went out and “traded with them” and made 5 more, the second took his two and gained two more, but the servant who received one talent went and buried it.

When the man returns to settle his accounts; in the instance of the first two servants he was pleased that they each had taken what they were given and increased their masters money, expanded his portfolio, enlarged his estate (you get the point). Their lord says to them, “Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.” (Matthew 25:21 & 23) Pretty amazing praise of you ask me!

Yet in the instance of the final servant, his response was very different. “His master replied, ‘You wicked, lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I have not sown and gather where I have not scattered seed?  Well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest. ‘So take the bag of gold from him and give it to the one who has ten bags’. ‘ For whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them.”  (Matthew 25:26-29).

Seems pretty straight forward, right? Use your talents, money, gifts, faith, etc. for God and more will be given? Why then does this scripture intrigue me? Because its relevance is so real today. It’s a practical and applicable interaction with Christ!

Whatever it is that God has given you (which by the way is everything) blessings and challenges, need to be used to glorify Him! We are to take WHATEVER He has given us and increase it.

I have experienced the death of a spouse at the ripe age of 24, lived through the death of my first born from cancer. The loss I have experienced has equipped me to be comfort to those who are traversing similar roads. I have been gifted with a wonderful career that enables me to access a network of contacts and resources to help with finding jobs, medical care and so much more. The blessings and the pain can be used to grow the Kingdom…my ‘talents’ are plentiful and have nothing to do with my income.

This parable isn’t a diatribe on giving your money or a treatise on making sure that you are serving in your church; as it is often used. This is Jesus telling us that EVERYONE has been given something they can use to glorify God. Everyone has been given a means to reach out to those around them. EVERYONE is equipped right where they are to expand His Kingdom.

Not everyone is a great preacher or evangelist, not everyone has been blessed financially or with wonderful musical skills… everyone has been gifted… what you choose to do with that gift is up to you. You can use it to increase the kingdom or take your light and hide it under a basket.

I’d love to hear from you. Come back and visit at “Connectthedotblog”.

Experience God, Sundays at 10:30 am

bstuetze

Service-2-981x600-300x209

Yes that is an actual sign, outside at an actual church in my home town. Now before you jump to conclusions about this very well meaning sign creator, I’m sure that the way it reads is not the way it was meant. However, churches today behave that way, whether intentional or not.

Experience God, Sundays at 10:30 am. Well, what if I want to experience God at 2:30 pm on Thursday or 11:55 pm Friday night, sitting inside my car wondering whether or not to walk into that bar, night club or liquor store? I’m sure that the sign wasn’t meant to express that the only time you get to experience God was in that building at 10:30 am Sunday mornings; but more of an invitation to experience God at their church at that time. I guess the question I want to pose is where’s God the rest of the time?

Does God limit our experience of Him depending on the day, time or location? Does it matter if we are inside a ‘sacred’ building or with with a community of believers? Do we have to meet certain criteria before we can have an experience of God? NO!

Actually the gospels are full of God experiences, and they almost always take place out among the people in concert with the Holy Spirit.

Matthew 12:22-23, Then a demon-possessed man who was blind and mute was brought to Jesus, and He healed the man so that he could speak and see. The crowds were all amazed and asked, “Could this be the Son of David?”

Mark 1:33-34, ...and the whole town gathered at the door. And Jesus healed many who were ill with various diseases and drove out many demons. 

Luke 7:20-22, …The men came to Jesus and said, “John the Baptist sent us to ask, ‘Are you the One who was to come, or should we look for someone else?'” At that very hour Jesus healed many people of their diseases, afflictions, and evil spirits, and He gave sight to many who were blind. So He replied, “Go back and report to John what you have seen and heard: The blind receive sight, the lame walk, the lepers are cleaned, the deaf hear, the dead are raised and the good news is preached to the poor…

Jesus was with the people praying, healing, praying some more, listening to  the Spirit, and giving glory to the Father. Yes he went to the Temple, His Father’s house, but is that the only place he experienced God’s presence? No!

Does this mean we shouldn’t go to Church, No! Jesus calls us into fellowship with other believers. Acts 2:41-42 Those who embraced his message were baptized, and about three thousand were added to the believers that day. They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.

Think about it, how many letters did Paul write to the Churches across the ancient world? How many times did he implore the people of those churches to love, serve, provide and care for one another, (notice no mention of the building in which they met)?

Strangely enough this struck me last night as I was watching one of the plethora of Avenger movies with my husband and oldest son last night, (yes we like the Avenger Movies). We love the heroes and their sacrifices for the greater good. In this particular scene, Thor and Heimdall were speaking as they watched their home, Asgard burn and explode. Heimdall commented that, “Asgard is not a place, it’s the people”. I always find it humorous where there are Christian truths tucked away inside cultural mythology. The Church isn’t the building…it’s the people. And it’s when we are with the people, loving, serving, providing and caring that we experience God.

And by the way that can happen at any hour, in any location and on any day, “For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” Matthew 18:20.

I’d love to hear from you. Come back and visit at “Connectthedotblog”.

Humility Required…not Desired!

bstuetze

humility

For a highly motivated and driven individual, not hitting a goal hard and leaving it dying in the dust is never an option. However, sometimes it is a very painful reality. Finding a way through the complex range of emotions can be difficult…the key is not to be defeated. Yes, this sounds like the opening few sentences of the next “How To” business book or motivational “You Can Do Anything” article. Well it’s not. I missed a goal for the very first time in my professional career and it totally SUCKS.

I have felt defeated, bruised, my confidence is shaken and I have a hard time looking people in the face when they ask me how work is going. Especially those who have been friends for years and often talk of our various professional successes as if they are badges of honor. No, we don’t ever compare our successes like others do their cars, kids or paychecks. Believe it or not we do revel in each other’s triumphs.

Over the past weeks, it became painfully clear that although we had a bang-up year (in the best sense), my team was not going to achieve what we set out to achieve. I have been uncertain how to accept my defeat. In my mountaintop moments I often looked to my mentors, heroes and idols; could that be me some day? I want to make that kind of impact. How can I follow in their footsteps? Well the truth of the matter…I am.

Before Nelson Mandela united a nation, he was in prison for over two decades. How many setbacks did Abraham Lincoln suffer before he achieved the level of success that captures our imagination over one hundred and fifty years later. Did Steve Jobs achieve total world domination after building his first Mac…NO! Our leaders, heroes and idols are so often defined by their successes, it is after all,  what they are remembered for. We strive to be like them, read books and articles about them listen to endless TED Talks and quote them whenever we can. We don’t sit around thinking, “gosh I sure hope that I have to suffer the failures, humiliation, and persecution that they did“. GET REAL!!! Who wants to go through that, isn’t there a fast track, a short cut, a pill or “Get Out of Jail Free Card“, that can alleviate all that nastiness? No, my friend, there is not.

Yes, thinking through this, I do have a slightly better perspective. No, I am not back on my mountaintop, I’m still frustrated and a bit disillusioned. What I can say is this, knowing that the incredible people that I have looked up to all these years are indeed human and have also suffered failures and defeat does give me hope. I choose to move forward, learn where I need to adjust, how can I approach differently, rethink my box (not that I ever really worked in one) and go at it again.

We are not defined by our circumstances or what happens to us, anything that happens to us. We are defined by how we respond to, and through those circumstances. I may never change the world in the way some of my heroes have, but I will change it, and I will change it for the better. I will change it because I know I can and I will get up each day, no matter how difficult it may be, and go at it again.

Humility is a key characteristic of successful people. They have been knocked down, walked in others shoes and chosen to lead through that experience. Without humility, we can never truly understand or appreciate what we have and how hard we had to work to get there.

I’d love to hear from you. Come back and visit at “Connectthedotblog”.

 

Charming Can Only Get You So Far

bstuetze

strike three

I was interviewing a candidate the other day for a Director level position in my organization. Now to be fair, the candidate wasn’t really qualified for the job but I could play connect the dots from his job experience to the skills needed for someone in this position to be successful. Plus he seemed like a colorful character from his background so I thought, why not! I scheduled him for a Skype interview and set to work.

First there were multiple technical difficulties. He tried to take the interview on his tablet, while at work, surrounded by people. Strike one!

Then his tablet and his phone cut out, not once, not twice, but three times. Ball one!

Next he did NOT research my organization or even read the job description so he could not speak intelligently about either. Strike two!

He borrowed a phone from a co-worker, called back and apologized, while at the same time asking his co-workers to keep it down while he was on this call. Ball two!

I asked him, “When you reviewed the job description, which areas did you feel would be the most challenging for you?” He replied, “None of them, I don’t think I’ll have any challenges at all.” Ball three!

It’s a full count…needless to say; I’ve known pretty much from the beginning that this is not someone that I’m going to move forward with. However I wanted to get to the final question, because I was really curious as to how he would answer it. He’s labeled himself a ‘talker’ and that he can motivate and coach anyone, and that there are no challenges he can’t overcome. I’m trying to decide if he is charming in an overconfident kind of way or completely arrogant in a really annoying way.

“So why should I consider you for this position?”

His reply, “because I’m me, and no one is going to be better than me.” Strike three, you’re outta there!

One of the best things about a full count, there’s only one pitch left. You have one more chance to hit it out of the park, walk to first base or fail miserably. (And yes, for my baseball fans, I know they can hit a foul ball and it remains a full count; however for the purpose of the argument let’s assume one more pitch.)

Having a powerful personality, the ability to converse easily with people combined with a charismatic energy will get you much farther in life than those who don’t possess such characteristics; however it will only get you so far. I would choose someone with a strong skill set, who understands the work that needs to be done and the qualities of leadership necessary to succeed over someone who is relying solely on their personality to move them forward.

This candidate was one question away from a bottom of the 9th walk off home run; but he came to the plate swinging a twig at a fastball, he didn’t even make contact.

  • He didn’t research the company or the specific job.
  • He didn’t research the industry.
  • He wasn’t prepared to answer real questions about any specifics; e.g. his experience and how that related to the job requirements.
  • He actually said his personality gets him what he wants, and I think he believed it.
  • He certainly didn’t seek any assistance with how to appropriately answer interview questions

When given the opportunity to redeem an incredibly lack luster ‘at bat’ performance he had no idea what to say other than “I’m me”. Well you’re obviously not Babe Ruth, but perhaps this approach to interviewing has worked for him in the past. As far as this interview went, it was like watching my 10 year old son try to hit off Randy Johnson; painful to watch, but I love rooting for the underdog.

For more interviewing tips, resume writing help or job search advice check back again to; “Connectthedotblog”

DIY is Cool, Except in Your Job Search.

bstuetze

to do list

You inevitably can’t do a complete channel surf these days without hitting on some kind of DIY program. From rennovating your kitchen or bath to upgrading your dating life or turning your simple idea to a money making landslide. DIY is the trend that keeps on giving, except in your job search. This is one area of your life where having a little professional help can go a long, long way.

We’ve all been there filling out endless applications online and in person. Dressing up and prepping up for interview after interview only to not hear back. Face it, finding a job is a full time job; but at work, you have direction and structure. At work you have someone at the very minimum telling you where you’ll get the most bang for your buck. However when you are looking for work, there isn’t that person there helping, coaching, mentoring and motivating you to keep going.

DIY is not the way to go in a job search!

Now is the time to do a good hard review of the resources available to you. That means you need to step away from your computer and make a list of people you know that can help.

Who do you know in the industry?

  • Do the people that can help you, know you are looking for a new position?
  • Do they have an updated copy of your resume?
  • Have you reached out to industry professionals for an informational interview?
  • What networking opportunities are available in your area/industry?
  • Have you asked your network to critique your resume?
  • Friends, family, teachers, past co-workers, etc. you never know who may know someone you need to know.

I think the picture is getting clearer. You don’t have to go out and hire professional resume writer, although it may help. You don’t have to hire a career coach, however there are resources available that can assist you. Contact your local government job help organization, if you’re in school frequent your Career Services department. The point is, there is no reason to Do It Yourself! We aren’t talking a 2-day make over in your home; we’re talking about your future. This is not the time to try and go it alone, and the great thing is you don’t have to.

If anything good has come out of our recent recession it’s the recognition that job search skills and resources are a necessary part of every day life. Everyone needs a little assistance and direction sometimes.

That help can come in many forms:

  • Your local Department of Economic Security or Workforce Development
  • Educational assistance
  • Local staffing agencies
  • Reputable resume writing and career assistance organizations

Between your network of friends, family and associates and the availablity of public and private resources; you can turn this project from a to do into a done.

For more interviewing tips, resume writing help or job search advice check back again to; “Connectthedotblog”

Graduates- don’t wait till after graduation to start the job hunt! Start now!

bstuetze

8-29-13 graduates...

I’m always surprised to get a call from a graduate that I haven’t heard from in months only to find out they are not working, have not been working, and haven’t even begun the career search.

“How have you been?”

“Fine thanks.”

“What have you been up to?”

“I took a break from the job hunt after graduation, but now I’m ready to start looking.”

“Did you keep in touch with your intern/extern supervisor?”

“No. I kinda just wanted to give my brain a rest after school.”

“Have you started applying with any of the employers you met with while in school?”

“No.”

“Do you have an idea where you’d like to work?”

“No. I just want a job. Can you help?”

Unfortunately, this conversation is far from infrequent. It doesn’t seem to matter how often I inform my students they need to strike while the iron is hot; inevitably, there are those who feel a 6-month vacation is not going to affect their chances of gainful employment. Even worse, they don’t feel the education they worked so hard for adds enough value to their skill set to obtain a career over a job.

WAKE UP! The country is full of people just looking for a job. We live in a country running short on skilled, educated workers, and you just want a job? Why did you go to college? Why did you spend all that time begging, stealing, and borrowing all that money to obtain your degree? Surely it wasn’t to get just a job?

If you are looking ahead at your graduation within the next 6-12 months, you should already;

  • Have a list of employers you want to work for.
  • Have a list of contact at those employers.
  • Know how your training/education will add value to their organization.
  • Have a kick butt resume.
  • Have a stellar cover letter.
  • 3-5 professional references all lined up.
  • Letters of recommendation from your instructors, supervisors, volunteer coordinators, etc.

Last but, by no means, least you must have enthusiasm, ambition, and determination to not quit until you obtain the career you dreamt about when you started your educational journey.

  • Don’t take 6-months off. Don’t take 6-minutes off.
  • Don’t ignore your resources who are there to help you.
  • And by no means, don’t ever underestimate the power of your education.

    “Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.”
    ~Nelson Mandella

For more interviewing tips, resume writing help or job search advice check back again to; “Connectthedotblog”

If you were a Muppet which would you be? The Strangest Interview Question I’ve Been Asked

bstuetze

kermit-the-frog-the-muppets

I’ve been working with students and graduates on mock interviews. The one question I always get asked is, “What is the strangest quetion you’ve ever been asked in an interview?”

  • Well, it’s not, “If you were an animial what would you be?” (A Lion by the way.)
  • “Which cheesy 80’s song do you listen to the most?” (Anything Richard Marx.)
  • “Which Muppet do you most closely identify with?” (This is a toss up between Kermit the Frog and Fozzy Bear, and is a constant souce of disagreement between my mother an myself.)

The strangest interview question I ever received came from a man I never thought would hire me, at a company I didn’t think I was qualified to work for, at the first interview I thought I’d blown. One question threw me into such a tail spin, I didn’t know if I was coming or going.

“So, I’m going to give you three minutes to ask me anything you want to ask, then you get 60-seconds to tell me what you’ve learned.”

I spent three minutes shooting off questions trying to discover family, home, hobbies, education, religious, and political information about my interviewer.

“Time’s up,” he said. “What did you learn?”

My response? “Well, did you want me to find out about you personally or professionally?

His response? “You probably should have asked that question first, shouldn’t you?”

OUCH! I began to shot off all my Holmesian conclusions and with a look of sheepish satisfaction, craving a fatherly approval, he looked at me and replied, “Thank you. We’ll be intouch.”

I forgot to mention this was my last interview of a day-long round robin of interviews for what I thought was a dream job and I just blew it, or so I thought.

I believe all stories should have a happy ending. Needless to say, I did get the job, and within 2-years, he was my direct supervisor. He promoted me to my first department head position and became my best, most infuential and beloved mentor. One day I got the gumption up to ask him about the question.

“Jim, what was the point of that question? What were you looking for in an answer?”

“Bets, there is no right or wrong answer. It is a question to see how you can communicate in a stressful or uncomfortable situation with executive level leaders. You did great. You didn’t stop. You fully used your time. Your answer was full of humor and insight, and you spoke articulately.”

It’s not alway about the right answer. but the right attitude. Be positive, be confident, and take risks. You never know where they can lead you. Mine lead me to a career path that, if I had hesitated trying to find the right answer, I might have missed out on.

For more interviewing tips, resume writing help or job search advice check back again to; “Connectthedotblog”

Sound Funny to You? Sensory Part 3

bstuetze

sound

Have you ever listened to your recorded voice and catch yourself, “Oh my gosh, I sound just like my mom!” Then you find yourself talking with a lower voice or slower to correct what you think is just plain wrong? It’s not that different with an interview. Right along with “Sight” and Smell; Sound is a powerful influencer.

The first thing that normally comes to mind when we think of sound and how it relates to our interviewing performance is how we answer questions. That is a very true statement, but have you thought of how the following might influence your interview as well?

  • Noisy jewelry.
  • Noisy shoes.
  • Drinking from your thermos or 64oz Big Gulp.
  • Grinding your teeth.
  • Your cell phone vibrating in your purse or pocket.
  • The tone of your voice when you introduce yourself.
  • Clicking your nails or pen.
  • Tapping your feet on the floor.

Yes we all have nervous habits that make up our quirky uniqueness. However there is a time and place to display those and an interview is not one of them. I shared previously that the goal of an interview is to be able for the employer to visualize you in the job; the composed, confident, articulate, professional you.

Being aware of your quirky and noisy nervous twitches is the first step to keeping them under control. You however are not the most objective identifier. This is where a great interviewing coach or mentor can come into play. Sitting down with someone for a mock interview is the best preparation you could ask for. Let them help you identify those twitches so you can work on not doing them. Practice walking into a room, shaking hands and introducing yourself, smile, stand up straight and speak clearly and confidently.

A mock interview can help you recognize if you:

  • Mumble or slur your words.
  • Over use words such as; um, like, you know, uh, so, and other dead time fillers.
  • Grind your teeth.
  • Tap your feet.
  • Etc.

I know that not everyone feels comfortable having another person practice with them to identify areas for improvement. However, isn’t it better to find out what those areas are from an objective 3rd party than from the employer you are dying to work for? That’s like letting someone you don’t know cut your hair before you told them what style you wanted; not a smart idea.

An interview is a highly subjective moment in time. It’s you telling another person(s) that you’re all that and a bag of chips and hoping they believe you. Your best chance is to bring the most polished, practiced, prepared version of you to the table. The best way to accomplish that is to work with someone to help identify those areas where you don’t sound that way.

A friend of mine came to me for assistance with a job interview. She is a painfully shy young woman who has difficulty putting herself forward. We practiced question after question; she had her answers down and she was ready for whatever they asked. All she had to do was be able to walk in the door, shake a hand, smile, make eye contact and introduce herself. She didn’t think she could do it.

So what did we do? We went shopping! I took her to the mall to buy a new outfit for the interview and for each person that came up to us in the stores, she had to say, “Hi, my name is Billie, it’s so nice to meet you.” and shake their hand. I thought she was going to kill me but; 3 sales clerks, 2 cashiers and one waitress later, she had it down.

Yes she got the job, yes she still chides me for putting her through it and yes she credits the preparation, identification and practice to her success.

As the saying goes, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” Identify the areas for development, practice how to improve and then nail the interview!

Come back on Thursday, August 15th to find out how Touch can influence your interview!